A Family Affair

I've only talked to my SIL 3 times and I am already very tired of it.  In a way it is a good thing.  Any inkling that I had that keeping contact with them might have been a good thing has truly been squashed.  The guilt, the one upmanship, etc.  I can take it.  I have to admit this is pretty much 80% of my anxiety with all of this.  Dealing with them. 

My brother who I haven't talked to in about 8 years is older than me by 14 years (we had different dads).  So he was always more a father figure than brother.  I gave him too much power growing up and he abused it.  So I still get a sharp pang of fear when they call.  It doesn't last for which I am grateful, but I hate the Pavlovian response. 

Mental Constipation

I've been waking up early all week which usually means my mind is still working on things while I am sleeping.  So I know I am not getting enough out during the day.  Whether it is more sharing on this whole family event or just that some thing is bothering me and I haven't fully uncovered it?  I don't know.  But I hate these times.  It slowly drains me with an hour or two loss of sleep a night. 

One Day

One day I will open a box and find all the spackle and putty knives I have bought over the years.  Since every time I move I seem to be buying a more and I can never find them when I move again. 

Realized this morning why I have been pissed at my SIL for the last few days.  I hang out with different people now a days.  Unsolicited advice is usually not given and if you scratch me I am a rebel underneath.  So being told what I NEED to do really pisses me off.  I don't have to do jack.  I'll review the situation then make a decision. 

Tuesday Night

I can't remember the exact words, but I once read that men change the world by the strength of their arms while woman do it with their cunning.  This has been playing in my head for the last few days.  Also my bad habit of being attracted to sly manipulative women.  Enter my Mom.  She called me tonight to see how things were going and we talked for about 15 minutes.  She was very lucid and memory was good except for the days she was in the hospital, but that is normal for most people.  I could see that she is playing this up in the hopes of moving back north since she is extremely unhappy in FL.  I agree that she needs help in things like house cleaning and driving, but everything else she seems okay to me.  I know my Mom I know what she is capable of.  I learned from the best.  I know how to be a coyote and chew my arm right off if need be.  I could see under the veil when she got angry that my brother and SIL where angry that my Mom had bought me my car on her own since my old one was dying and I couldn't afford another.  We know that my SIL family is very well off and have given them BMWs and such.  Now I remember why I like the buffer zone with my family and seeing them infrequently or not at all is so appealing to me.  I will see how this plays out.

Resumes

One of my friends is getting out of the marines and is looking for a job.  He just made his resume.  In helping I found this and I figured I would share.

These are from actual resumes:

"Personal: I'm married with 9 children. I don't require prescription drugs.

"I am extremely loyal to my present firm, so please don't let them know of my immediate availability."

"Qualifications: I am a man filled with passion and integrity, and I can act on short notice. I'm a class act and do not come cheap."

"I intentionally omitted my salary history. I've made money and lost money. I've been rich and I've been poor. I prefer being rich."

"Note: Please don't misconstrue my 14 jobs as 'job-hopping'. I have never quit a job."

"Number of dependents: 40."

"Marital Status: Often. Children: Various."

RESUME BLOOPERS

"Here are my qualifications for you to overlook."

REASONS FOR LEAVING THE LAST JOB:

"Responsibility makes me nervous."

"They insisted that all employees get to work by 8:45 every morning. Couldn't work under those conditions."

REASONS FOR LEAVING MY LAST JOB:

"Was met with a string of broken promises and lies, as well as cockroaches."

"I was working for my mom until she decided to move."

"The company made me a scapegoat - just like my three previous employers."

JOB RESPONSIBILITIES:

"While I am open to the initial nature of an assignment, I am decidedly disposed that it be so oriented as to at least partially incorporate the experience enjoyed heretofore and that it be configured so as to ultimately lead to the application of more rarefied facets of financial management as the major sphere of responsibility."

"I was proud to win the Gregg Typting Award."

SPECIAL REQUESTS & JOB OBJECTIVES:

"Please call me after 5:30 because I am self-employed and my employer does not know I am looking for another job."

"My goal is to be a meteorologist. But since I have no training in meteorology, I suppose I should try stock brokerage."

"I procrastinate - especially when the task is unpleasant."

PHYSICAL DISABILITIES:

"Minor allergies to house cats and Mongolian sheep."

PERSONAL INTERESTS:

"Donating blood. 14 gallons sofar."

SMALL TYPOS THAT CAN CHANGE THE MEANING:

"Education: College, August 1880-May 1984."

"Work Experience: Dealing with customers' conflicts that arouse."

"Develop and recommend an annual operating expense fudget."

"I'm a rabid typist."

"Instrumental in ruining entire operation for a Midwest chain operation."

When in Doubt

When in doubt road trip.  Actually I just ran some errand, but the weather is great outside.  I got to drive with the window down and crank some kicking music.  It was a slice of paradise.  It reminded me to always be good to myself.  It balanced me out from all the crap going on.  Something I need right now.  Feelings aren't facts just feelings.  They don't always accurately reflect how reality is.  So some fresh air, the wonders of nature, and of course some good tunes to balance the scales out.

Oh Yeah

Oh yeah you ladies probably want to know how the phone call went last night.  Whoops.  Actually I got her answering machine.  She emailed me back apologizing that she had to work late for a project I knew she was doing.  No biggie.  I will try again tomorrow night.

The other woman that agreed to go out just started school again so she will be a while.  I guess from fruit loops to busy woman.  At least I am making the rounds.

Ooooo.  Yoga soreness is setting in from this mornings class.  It was a good class except when I had to go chase my left nut as it rolled across the floor from blond and perky wanting us to do a split then grab our both of our big toes at the same time.  However I did catch her checking me out when I was leaving.  I got a chance to smile back, but I was late for a patient.  Next week she is gone so this may be like a Stalin 5 year plan.