Tuesday, September 11, 2007

Dude, where's your pants?

This happened not once, but twice tonight at pizza. My manager had already warned my they had been strange on the phone. So the first guy I know I've been there before and he's not a tipper so I'm looking forward to the delivery. Anyway when I get there their is a bad of garbage on his doorstep which is on the third floor. Yeah I love trekking up 3 flights of stairs to get stiffed. Anyway I knock ... I knock again ... knock yet again. Then my phone comes out and I call and get nothing. So I'm like I'm not coming back tonight if he calls for it. Anyway I get down to my car when I hear the door open up and the guy is calling for me. Bastard! So I make the trek back upstairs to find the guy in his underwear. I really don't want to know if that's a hard on he has. So I give him the receipt to fill out which he does and actually gives me $2 for a tip. I'm amazed.

The second guy was better. My manager couldn't understand him on the phone so besides his order I'm either delivering 4 Cokes or 4 Sprites. This guys speech must REALLY suck if you can't tell the difference. So I have to lug all this crap to his house. So I'm waiting and finally the door opens up and I tell him how much it is. It's kind of dark in the house and he's holding his hand out, but it's still inside. After a few I realize he is holding out money while trying to hold a towel around his waist even though he is wearing a business shirt. Like WTF! Put some clothes on before you answer the door. Now NONE of the women have this problem. Anyway this guy gave me a $12 tip so he can do whatever the hell he wants. He can clamp a mousetrap on his balls for all I care for that kind of money.

Well the frazzleness of the day continued into the night. When I got to pizza I looked at the schedule only to find that I was not leaving at 9 to go dancing, but I was closing alone. Now I truly HATE closing. You're there late, lot of extra cleaning work, little extra money. Now on a Friday or Saturday night that could mean significant money, but on a dead night like tonight it royally sucks. I sat around for hours doing nothing and I couldn't fucking leave. The great piece of news was that I was now working Friday when I was suppose to be going out with CPA girl. SHIT! I'm really happy we're getting together tomorrow for lunch and I hope she is free Sunday now. I did make sure to now have Wednesdays and Fridays off in the future. We talked tonight and are both looking forward to seeing each other. It's nice to feel a little electricity in our conversation.

Many people sent me condolences on my Dad and I thank you. However he is just my biological Dad. I haven't talked to him in 17 years. My ex or Eric have never met him. The last time we talked was the fourth time he wanted a separation between us. I said to myself I don't fucking need this anymore. I needed a Father when I was young and then in my twenties I was just beyond it. The only good my Dad can do me know is whatever money I get when he dies. Sorry to sound like a ghoul, but it's the truth. He stole a lot of money from his mom and all the grandchildren when his father died. His siblings are waiting for him to die and they are making sure I'm going to go after the money for myself and Eric. There was a point I didn't want the money, but now I see it as a way that I could see my son every month. It took my Mom 3 strokes for us to have a decent relationship. Let me tell you there isn't much left. Now with my Dad it may take his death to finally do something useful for me.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

your pizza stories are so funny but at least you got tips out of those two men.

Anonymous said...

Mike it breaks my heart to hear about your relationship with your Dad, and I know you are good with things now, but I so wish you knew the feeling of really good father/son bonding. And maybe you will and do with your own son. Good luck with CPA girl, sounds like things arel flowing very nicely....smiles...
                                                                                                            Lovins...TrayCee

Anonymous said...

I'm sorry, Mike.  And, sometimes, people reap what they sow.

BTW, maybe if you get either of these customers again, perhaps you could call them before going up 3 flights of stairs (at least with the first guy)?