What a Day

What a day that started at 3:30 am this morning.  Well I am back in Virginia with my Mom and everything went well.  Glad we ended up doing it this way since it took a lot out of her.  When we arrived at the airport in Virginia she was like "I don't want to go."  I told her she had to and it all went smoothly after that.  I can't believe they didn't;t get a walker for her down at rehab.  If she holds onto something she can walk fine, but out in the open with nothing to hold on to forget about it.  Well the fun is just beginning.

Airplane Comments

When I boarded my first plane today and I looked through the window into the cockpit and saw the pilot looking in a text book and writing things down I thought that wasn't a good sign.  However I am still here so I guess he got what he needed.

I was boarded and watched the flight attendant do her little safety show.  I think she gave up a long time ago that anyone was paying attention.  I've seen better hand gestures from a person having a seizure.

Boy were the pushing the upgrades to first class.  I mean how much soda could I drink in a hour and half flight that would equal $35.  Leaving first out of the plane really doesn't do it for me.  More leg room not really.  Let me lay down across 2 seats and we got a deal. 

On the topic of leg room I realized why they put your stuff in front of you.  You won;t put your feet on your stuff, but what the hey if it someone else's.

Yes I had way TOO much time on my hands today.

Wednesday

Low level stress still is with me.  There is a lot that needs to be done over the next few days.  I have planned my usual life, both jobs, a weekend seminar, and my Mom.  It will be fun.  Yeah right.  There is a lot of stuff, but I have done all I can.  Lot of stuff will be out of my control which I never like.  The rest will probably be that my Mom will be here now.  No more buffer zone.  I'll need to interact with her a few times a week.  Part of me is looking forward the other is not.  I didn't like the comment from the assisted living place seeing me run over in between patients to take care of stuff and saying get use to it.  My life is packed as it is I don't want more stuff. 

Little sad I couldn't get a double extended room, but the short notice and needing a first floor room made it hard.  I'll sleep in my sleeping bag the days my Mom is here, but I can use the place the rest of the time.  I had to pay for a week so I will get my money's worth.  It is really nice to have a real freezer.  Mine is so tiny it is hard to get a lot of things in to it since it won't stay.

The Letter

I don't know why I am printing this here, but my gut says to so I am.  I guess it is a different way of dealing with my ex so sharing it bleeds off some of the energy.

Dear Laura,

 

You missed my point entirely.  I know you do not want to deal with me, but we have a son together and as long as he is alive that will be the way it is.  Avoiding me on all these points just waste time. 

 

Eric is a child and it is not his responsibility to inform me of his upbringing.  This has nothing to do with his being baptized.  If he wants to I am happy for him.  My point is that if this kind of stuff is brought up to one of us and most of this stuff will be brought up to you first since you have physical custody.  Just as if we were together we would have told him we would talk about it between us before we gave him a decision.  This is something we have always agreed on even when we were together and agreed to it in court.  Whether together or separated we need to be a united front in Eric’s upbringing.  I feel in your avoidance to interact with me you are passing it onto Eric.  This is what I find inappropriate.

 

Mike

Tuesday Night

Boy I can't wait till I don't have to work a second job.  I didn't have to work tonight and like the last 2 nights I have headed over to Starbucks to relax and read.  It's a nice thing. 

My Mom was off tonight when I called her.  Our worry now is that she will not perform well when she is evaluated Friday.  Since a poor evaluation will mean more money each month for her.

Talking to one of my patients today and I never thought of the flip side of the coin.  Since the Navy is like the top employer around here almost everyone is military.  Most of the women I have met have been military wives.  No problem here since there is a slice of everything in that population.  Her complaint was that if you didn't want a military man there was slim pickings.  That being Bubba and Earl.  Just an interesting observation.

With my ex I am going to need to talk to her.  For the last 7 years yes that includes the last 5 years of marriage.  My ex has been very angry that if we ever separated that we would still have to have contact because of our son.  This whole broken communication thing is her way of trying to get around it.  If it didn't affect our son I could give a shit what she did.  However if she needs to go through him to communicate things that's not good.  He is a child and does not need the responsibility of an adult nor responsibility that is not even his.

What a Crazy Week

Well I got most everything set for my Mom.  I have a home health aide to be with her when I will be out Friday through Sunday.  Got a nice place for us to stay with a full kitchen so that she can be cooked for.  Moved in everything I had and put it up or together.  The place will sign for my Mom's bed tomorrow which is a relief.

I feel I have lost touch with the business this week.  Something I was scared of.  My patients are rescheduling like mad this week also which is not helping.  At least it is down hill from here with everything.

Funny thing amongst all this craziness I run into a woman this morning at the store that I like and I think she liked me.  However of all the times to meet someone this week is not it. The good thing is that I have grasped that she will not be the LAST woman that I meet.

On another note my ex has told me she wants no in person or voice contact with me ever.  LOL.  I really don't want to drop down to written communication, but I guess I will. 

Monday Night

Well tired after a stressed day.  Finalizing everything for the whole Mom episode at the end of the week.  So far looks as good as it's going to get.  I will call the home health aide place tomorrow to schedule someone to be with my Mom. 

Old defects are rearing the ugly heads.  I was actually scared to ask my brother tonight for money to repay what I have already spent on our Mom.  It's her money and he already told me to tell him the amount.  That old tape of having to prove myself was playing, but I asked and it all went well.

I treated myself to some down time at Starbucks tonight before my meeting.  Just to read, play Soduko, and RELAX.  Something came up there.  When I walked in a woman that was sitting outside was looking at me so I smiled in her direction.  Went inside, got my drink, and sat down in a comfy chair to relax.  Last thing I wanted today was courtship rituals.  Anyway after I sit down she changes her chair so her back is to me.  Whatever.  At some point in the future she packs her stuff up, walks in, looks through the newspaper rack for something then sits in the chair next to me, gets comfy and turns her back to me.  The place is completely empty.  I have never got this back to a guy you like.  I see it a lot and I still don't get it.  Anyway after a while she just left.

"I would never be part of a club that would have me as a member." ~ Groucho Marx

One thing I have realized that has changed since I have separated is that I am no longer attracted to women that are attracted to me.  When I first separated it was like a huge thing if someone was attracted to me.  It automatically made me attracted to them.  Gratefully now that has changed.  I didn't want to be that way. 

 

The Best Laid Plans ...

Well I will leave early Thursday morning to pick up my Mom.  My Aunt & Uncle are uncomfortable picking her up so I will rent a car and pick her up.  Then come back in the afternoon.

I misunderstood the assisted living place.  She can not be evaluated and move in on the same day.  So she will be evaluated Friday and move in Monday.  Not too bad except that I have a seminar this whole weekend and need to work Saturday morning and evening.  So either my brother needs to come down and be with her while I'm out or I will need to get a home health aide. 

I put together her furniture today and brought over some pictures I had in storage to liven the place up.  Oh that's right I need to get her phone and cable connected.  Oye.  Boy this all got dumped in my lap didn't it.