Tuesday, January 3, 2006

Bad Things to Hear During Surgery

To all my readers.  We take a short break from all this serious stuff for some sick laughs.

Hearing Bad Things During Surgery

 

1. Better save that. We'll need it for the autopsy.

2. "Accept this sacrifice, O Great Lord of Darkness."

3. Bo! Bo! Come back with that. Bad dog!

4. Wait a minute, if this is his spleen, then what's that?

5. Hand me that... uh... that uh... that thingy there.

6. Oh no! Where's my Rolex.

7. Oops! Hey, has anyone ever survived from 500 ml of this stuff before?

8. There go the lights again?

9. "Ya know, there's big money in kidneys? and this guy's got two of 'em."

10. Everybody stand back! I lost my contact lens!

11. Could you stop that thing from beating; it's throwing off my concentration.

12. What's this doing here?

13. I hate it when they're missing stuff in here.

14. That's cool. Now can you make his leg twitch by pressing that one?!

15. Well folks, this will be an experiment for all of us.

16. Sterile schmerile. The floor's clean, right?

17. OK, now take a picture from this angle. This is truly a freak of nature.

18. This patient has already had some kids, am I correct?

19. Nurse, did this patient sign an organ donation card?

20. Don't worry. I think it is sharp enough.

21. What do you mean "You want a divorce?!?"

22. FIRE! FIRE! Everyone get out!

23. Oh no! Page 47 of the manual is missing!

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hey Mike, how ya doing?  This was way too funny today! I'm going "under" next week, and I'm hoping & praying I DO NOT hear ANY of these things!  YIKES!
Ok, you left me a message on my journal about wanting to hear the story of my #3.....I'm confused!  There isn't a story, its just one of my greatest fears is getting hit head on while driving OR getting hit by a train......thats about as exciting as it gets...sorry!  Keep up the laughs here!  I really need them!
Lots of Hugs, Linda

Anonymous said...

Very funny as always!
Hugs, lisa

Anonymous said...

I'm sick I really loved this one LMAO
# 2 got me going and then I couldn't stop
laughing thanks Mike!
Hugs, Marina